I miss them both

I am spending tonight in our home, alone.

Landon is staying the night at his Mema's(Theron's mom), and well..

Theron himself is up North working. So where does that leave me?

It has been so incredibly quite. I've got some things done around the house, and with my blog.

It's peaceful, relaxing, clean.. and to be completely honest, I don't like it. Not one single bit.

I would much rather be chasing my little man around the house, picking up toys that I had just put away 5 minutes before.

Listening to Landon play and make a big wet mess in the bathroom during his bath while I do dishes and put

away left overs from dinner.

I miss Landon asking me a question every 15 seconds.
I miss him throwing his rubber bugs at me. And occasionally getting caught in my hair..

I miss him running and jumping around and telling him to quit it because he'll upset the neighbors, then I get to hear his sweet little voice apologize.

I miss him asking to hold on and telling me that he's busy to drag out going to bed.

I miss watching him get his step stool out so he can brush his teeth.

I miss him begging me to turn on his closet light, the hall way light, and his night light cause he's afraid of what's lurking in the dark.

 And I'll miss him waking up around 3am, like every single morning, to come crawl into bed next to me.

I miss the loudness, craziness, the crying.. because i'm missing the smiles, and laughter, and jokes, and his adorable little sayings as well. 

And I miss him. You know... 'him'.. The love of my life.

And I have a feeling that tonight, is going to be 'one of those nights'.. the restless ones.

Where I can't get him off my mind. No amount blankets and pillows can get me comfortable enough to doze off to sleep.

I'll most likely cry, text him, call him.. knowing he's off watch and getting his much needed rest.

So overworked his phone ringing never even wakes him up.

Then i'll send him another text or two about how i'm so lonely, sleeping in this darn house by myself, and Landon won't even be here to make it okay.

I am completely a-l-o-n-e. 

I can only be a little hopeful that waking up early this morning.. has tired me out enough that I won't be laying in bed for more than a couple hours. 

Damn these nights.